Emotion

16 September 2008

11:45 PM

It would be tough to describe my emotional state right now. I'm experiencing so much, all at once. Happiness... Grief... Stress... Relief... Love...

Assuming I actually take the time to write out everything running through my mind right now, this entry may touch upon all of those, so please, bear with me.

Last time I wrote was at the end of spring break.. Oh man.. How things have changed since then...

Mmm... Summer was great. I got some work done by taking Calc III during second session. Because my summer school session was the same as Niki's, and because our classes were at the same time, He and I started going to the gym regularly, and I actually started to build muscle, which never really happened when I used to go to the gym a few years ago. I hung out with my friends quite a bit, which was great. I missed spending time with them =)

At the end of July, I was at a friend's house partying and I met a girl. Sounds typical enough, right? Surprisingly though, even to me, this was a unique experience. She walked in with a couple of her friends, and I was on the other side of the house when she did. I immediately noticed her, but did not immediately take any action. Throughout the night, I would introduce myself to her, ask her to do me a small favor or two (like handing me a couple beers from the fridge), and tease her. Then, something happened. I'm not sure how, but we started talking - first about small stuff, as most people do at parties. But then our conversation got much deeper. We talked about life goals and our pasts and our passions. We talked for about an hour or an hour and a half. The conversation went on endlessly, and from that point on, I was hooked. Never had I connected with anyone in such a way. It was amazing. At the end of the night, we said goodbye, and I asked for her phone number, and once I got home the next day, I found her on MySpace.

Once I started talking to her on MySpace, on AIM after, and eventually over the phone (which I love doing, btw), I started wondering when the time would come when we would run out of things to talk about and things would get awkward between us. But then, an entire week went by, then two... And now it's been over a month and a half, and conversation is as pleasant as ever =)
I mean, yeah, there are points where we're silent on the phone, but it's never been awkward. It's comforting, actually, to just sit silently, knowing she's on the other end of the line...
=D
Mm... Because of the short amount of time we had to spend with each other before I left (and some other minor factors) we decided when I moved that we should remain friends for now. I still talk to her every day, though. It makes me really happy =)

Moving off of that.. I'm back in Los Angeles now, and school has started. We're already in the fourth week, which is awesome because things are going so fast, and vacation will be here in no time =)
I'm only taking four classes this semester since I took Calculus over the summer, which takes a load off of me. The workload is starting to get heavier this week, though, which sucks. Oh well. I'll manage with it. Fraternity things are going well this semester, and I'm excited about that. Can't give out many details, but I just wanted to mention it, heh.

I found out that Chris Conzen died today. It was really shocking to hear about. The more I think about it, the more I realize he affected so many people, including me. When I think back, I can honestly say that he was a major influence in terms of where I am today. He taught me a ton about computers. He was there the first time I took one apart, and explained how to properly put it back together. He got me more interested into my entire field of study. That's crazy...

*sigh* ... I really wanted to write more in here, about everything, but I can't take the time tonight to do it. Umm... If I don't write again soon, feel free to leave a comment and let me know what you'd like me to write more about.

Rest in peace, Conzen.
Vaniah Schwenoha